You’re Going to Be Okay
For D, who sometimes gets sad but doesn’t like to talk about it. And for T, who needs to be seen sometimes.
You might be feeling like things aren’t okay, like life hasn’t turned out how you thought it would, or should. Today I’d like to take a minute and tell you it’s going to be okay. Maybe it’s been a long time since someone told you things would turn out alright, but it feels nice to hear it. And it’s true.
How do I know it’s all going to be okay? Because if it’s not okay, then it’s not the end. Period. That’s what I believe.
I can already hear the arguments to that statement. Sometimes people die or terrible things happen in life. How can that possibly be okay? If it’s not okay, it’s not the end. And some of the worst, most painful things in life, teach us the most. Those times can push us into the best times of our lives.
But Right Now
Right now, there’s a chance you’re sleeping on someone else’s couch. Your finances or any plan you had, might have gone astray.
You may have had to create your own family because the one you had wasn’t the one you needed. You aren’t always born into the best soil for growing. But it’s part of your story.
Maybe the person you love doesn’t love you back. You have a vision of what could be, but they don’t see it the same. That’s okay.
Maybe you’re struggling with addiction. Raw dogging life feels a little too intense and you aren’t sure how to cope without substances.
Maybe you’re having a hard time loving yourself. After all, the world has shown you time and again that people who should love you, don’t. So why would you love yourself any differently?
No one is immune to challenge. No one gets a free pass. We all get to go through the tough stuff.
Life can be ugly. That’s real. It isn’t all going to be great. There are going to be dark, hard times. Times where you aren’t sure how it’s going to get better. There will be times when you won’t know how to get out of the hole you’ve dug, or someone else has dug for you.
But life can also be beautiful. There are two sides to that coin. Light and dark. Up and down. Hard times, and great times. No matter what you’re going through, good or bad, nothing lasts forever.
If times are tough for you now, take comfort in knowing it won’t keep going that way endlessly. And awesomely enough, you have everything you need within you right now to change it. You have all the materials to create a great life.
Where to Begin
It can feel overwhelming to try to create some far-off “good life”. But it’s not just any life, it’s your life. The life you’re going to live for many years to come. So why not put in the work and make it as awesome as you can?
The first step is to take a look around at where you are right now. I don’t just mean where you’re living. But how are things going? How are you? Zoom out a little. This isn’t the poor me pity hour. This is just being realistic. “This is what life is like in this moment for me.”
Once you’re honest with yourself about the things you like, and don’t like about your life, be honest about who got you there. The answer is you. And not in an, “I blame you” way. In an “I’m taking accountability for my choices” way. You made decisions that led you here. Maybe some of those decisions were out of your hands. That means God wants you to be here. There is something for you here, some lesson to be learned.
Be real with yourself. You got you here. However it happened no longer matters. You’re here. And that’s okay even if you don’t want to be here. Because once you do this, once you admit you got yourself here, you can see that you have the power to get yourself somewhere else.
The power to change your life is within you. You can take all those things you don’t like, and change them. We like to overcomplicate life, but it’s really not that complex.
If you hate your job, get a different one. If you don’t have a job at all, get out there and find one. If you feel as though you don’t have purpose, look for it. If you feel sad, spend less time alone. If you feel bored, go learn something new.
It doesn’t matter how young or old you are. If there’s something you don’t like about your life, change it.
That’s the beautiful part of life. You can change so many things. Now I know you have a list of excuses why you can’t do the thing I’m challenging you to do.
“I’m too old.”
“I don’t know enough.”
“It’s too hard.”
“I’m scared.”
“I don’t know where to start.”
No matter what the excuse, that’s what it is, an excuse. If someone put a gun to your head and told you to figure it out, you’d find a way. Because it would be life or death. Well, there are different kinds of death. What about the death of your soul? Just breathing isn’t enough. Live your life.
Hugs
I said all of that above to really say, I see you. I see that you’re struggling. I see that it’s hard. It’s really FUCKING hard this whole life thing.
It is okay if you’re struggling. It’s okay if you don’t know what to do next.
But there’s always a next. A next step, a next plan, a next decision. There is always a way forward. Make a choice to change something, and the path forward reveals itself.
The magic is in believing it can change. And it can.
Anything in this life can change. Anything at all. At the risk of sounding like a Disney Princess, “If you just believe”.
I know this post was a little shorter than my normal ones, but I just felt really called to share this one. Several people I know have been struggling. And I want them to know they aren’t alone.
That’s the last thing I’ll leave you with. You don’t have to be alone. Find family, friends, or any support you need. That’s another thing that will show itself to you if you look for it. People.
Even us weirdos have tribes. Let your freak flag fly and find your people. They really help in those moments when life gets hard. I see you. I love you. And I’m sending wishes your way. (Magic wishes so you better use them).
Love you!
If you want to check out the Podcast I co-host, go here:
Growing Up for Adults on Spotify
For my favorite books, and health and wellness products, go here:
And check out the books I authored here:
How to Be Friends with Your Ex
Thanks so much for reading today. I love you and want all the best for you.
